Tanked.

What happened? Did some of the puppies live and it made you so upset you drank til you couldn't feel feelings anymore? Oh wait.

Fop.

Taking the phrase ultimate dude mobile to a higher level, I could care less. I would however advise against revving up, peeling out, going real fast and breaking really quick resulting in a sling launch of dudes but, unfortunately that's probably exactly what's going to happen.

Lascivious.

If I could have it my way John Waters and I would be a song and dance lounge duo at Nye's every Monday night. We'd call ourselves the Lubricious Little League.

Heavy.

Okay, I would never want to encourage violence but, come on how bad do you want to be in this gang? It's like hip hop luxury car gang meets the cool high school jock hang out meets disco and topping it off with just a trifle of roadhouse trash. How bad to you want to be a part of this haversack of enchantment?
You know, I bet they aren't even bad at all, I bet they are good.

Paramountcy.

It's a piano tie made into a piano bow.
Now where are we supposed to put this on the classification chart of dignity? We all know the piano tie retired with Casio's Scientific calculator watch. I must say it is done in an awfully snappy way.
Though, I'm biased because immediately after viewing this Dinah Shore's "Buttons & Bows" started playing in my head and has made me feel just fine about a piano tie in a bow.

Latten.

Don't get me wrong I can appreciate German performance art. When it comes to parties I'd rather have some Joseph Beuys around any day than the ol'e body painting standby.

Insufflate.

Mouth breathers can be a displeasure to be sat next to or near in movies, elevators, and meetings etc. but, let's not forget that
nose breathers will have their tormenting tendencies as well.

Enfeeble.

What's interesting or not interesting about irony is that when it's simmered in with high art the tone grows increasingly boring, in that haute sort of way.

Passports.

Fake I.D.'s are terrific and if you can make it work take full advantage because there is nothing better than telling bar stories from when you were 16 years old.

Austere.

Pros & Cons of Karaoke.

Pros: the friends, the drinks, Frank Sinatra, Cyndi Lauper, Jimmy Buffet, Neil Diamond, Journey, Michael Jackson, Bruce Springsteen, Don Mclean, Chuck Berry, Bonnie Tyler, Gloria Gaynor, Sir-Mix-Alot, Queen, ABBA Garth Brooks, Meatloaf, Van Morrison, Spice Girls, Billy Joel, and of course WHAM.

Cons: serious people.



Please feel free to suggest anything I may have left out of the Pros and Cons of Karaoke.

Supine.

Dude, your car is right where you left it.

Tumult.

Alright so you got some guy all steamed up about Talking heads post Brian Eno and now there's no way out. The best thing to do in this situation is to just back down and tell him he's right about everything even about mayonnaise being better than miracle whip, get out of there, go order up yourself a Pablo Escabar at the bar and move on.
If there's no patience in an argument, what's the point?

FININT.

Espionage is so voyeuristicly neat! Honestly, I never got my hands on a spy kit when I was a child but, if I would have I bet I would be a lot less flustered about occupational pursuits. The only drawback would be all those boring nuclear weapon seminars you have to go to.

Full of hot air.

The arrogance level on guys who go tanning is worse than people who know too much about wine.

Plucky.

We all have these moments in our life where we look around and wonder how we got there and say to ourselves
"this permanent hangover situation is no where near what I had planned".
At points in life like this it's best to use the Pollyanna strategy and play the Glad Game. What's the Glad Game? The Glad Game consists of finding something to be glad about in every situation.